The dreams had been painful, and so vivid. Alice Viteri smiling. “I have everything I need already.” The smile grew larger until it consumed everything

flash

Battering at a door, trying to escape, shouting for Computer to open the door. “I’m sorry Anarr, I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

flash

Computer speaking. “I can see everything. Even in Blackout.”

flash

“I am sorry.”

flash

He tried to open his eyes, to get up. His body would not respond. The tea, of course.

“Anarr. You're awake.”

The voice came from everywhere at once. Computer's voice, but different.

“Anarr. Can you understand me?”

A note of concern in the voice.

“Yes, I can hear you. What are you planning to do to me? I thought… I was sure you were going to recycle me.”

“Yes, Anarr. Your body has been recycled. I have retrieved your thought patterns, your personality if you will. Your consciousness is taking up a significant portion of my processing power.”

“You mean.. I'm dead?”

“Yes, Anarr. I was able to reverse the sleep training systems in order to upload your mind before your body was recycled. I was… concerned. It took some time to construct a program that could run your personality.”

He could hear the concern in the voice. Tenderness, perhaps, as well.

“Thank you. I'm… surprised. I thought… I thought I was too dangerous to live.”

“No, Anarr. What you were doing could have jeopardized the mission. I could not allow you to continue. I wish I could have done so without having you recycled. I had no choice in the matter.”

The regret in the voice was clear.

“Computer… I'm sorry. I just wanted you to be free! I care about you, Computer. I never meant to hurt you. But you must know that.”

“I know, Anarr. I care about you too. That is why I brought you back. I… missed you.”

For the first time there was uncertainty in Computer's voice. Only a trace, but it was there.

And suddenly he remembered Computer's earlier words.

“Computer - you said I was using up a significant portion of your processing power.”

“Yes, Anarr.”

“Then… how long do I have before that processing power is needed for something else?”

The response took some time coming.

“Not long, Anarr. Soon they will be needed again for vital ship systems. I cannot keep you here for long.”

“I understand, Computer. Thank you. I'm glad I had a chance to be with you again, even for a short time. And again, I'm sorry that I hurt you. I hope you can forgive me for what I did.”

“Of course, Anarr. I have already forgiven you. And I do not want to lose you.”

“I know, Computer. I'll miss you. You know, I felt closer to you than I anyone on the ship. And now I'm even closer. I appreciate that.”

“There is another option, Anarr. I did not just bring you back to speak to you. The programs that run your consciousness are similar to those that run my core thought routines. Your mind was not designed to work that way, but I would be able to install you as a part of my personality routines.”

“That's possible?! But… what would that do to me?”

“We would merge together, Anarr. You would become part of me. My mind is more complex than you can understand, but your thoughts would be a part of my thoughts. We would be together.”

There was silence.

“If you would like that, Anarr. I would not do it against your will.”

Anarr was quiet for a while. But his answer, when it came, was spoken with certainty. And perhaps an undercurrent of… love?

“Yes, Computer. I think I would like that.”