News, Turn 8

Mission Progress Report

Mission Progress, 1st February 2650 00:00:00 SHIP TIME

  • Earth time 14/02/2650 07:29:20 ZULU
  • Mission time elapsed 599 years, 51 days Ship relative
  • Current Acceleration: -0.00033193 m/s2
  • Velocity: 0.0192c Earth relative
  • Fuel: 46.0%
  • All systems are operating under revised expectations.

ACTP Concluded

Computer has announced that the ACTP has now achieved its purpose and the project has been closed. Congratulations all round, and all participants are awarded a 10% increase in the fabber rations for life as thanks. Of course this represents a fabber ration cut, as all members have reverted to normal citizen status and no longer enjoy the generous allowances intended for fixing the ship.

Former members of the ACTP are invited to continue meeting in The Forum once a month to continue to foster the excellent inter-departmental working relationship they have formed.

Templar Smith: The Gentleman Thief? A retrospective.

Following the unfortunate death of Templar Smith in what is only being described as a “Delayed inversion-related incident”, TOROID! magazine takes a few minutes to look at the man thought by many to be the real identity of the notorious cat burglar “The Gentleman Thief Smith”, thief of the carbon sculpture of Dancer Rainbow, the legendary beard of Benjamin Grey, who had never cut his hair previously, and apparently wanted by the Cosa Nostra for crimes many and varied.

In recent times, Templar has joined other ACTP members in their successful quest to save the ship by enacting the flip. Apparently providing valuable intelligence on long lost technology hidden in toroid 4, guiding the needy through Blackout in their quests and a hunt for a long lost library of ancient knowledge.

With his passing we find the world that much less colourful. Templar Smith, we salute you! (OK, you're laying it on a bit thick now -Ed)

Excerpt from TOROID! Magazine's obituaries section.

Captain Lyla Red Inaugurated

At the last ACTP meeting Computer announced that Marshal Lyla Red has been promoted to Captain Lyla Red. Apparently the Captain's duties had been unfulfilled for the last few hundred years, but hopefully with Lyla's appointment the work schedules will be kept up to date and the ship will finally have some proper leadership.

Apparently our intrepid Captain has already embarked on an adventure deep into the more dangerous areas of the ship, so we can only hope that she comes back safe and sound.

Amandine Boullion announced as Head of Harmony

There is a general feeling that the next head of Harmony should come from the entertainment side of the department to balance out the recent promotion of Marshal Lyla to Captain and the fact that the last three heads of Harmony have been Marshals.

When Computer is perceived as acting on this perception by shortlisting only Morning Rainbow and Amandine Boullion, some unrest is heard coming from the law enforcers, who had rallied behind Samuel Red as a good solid candidate for the position.

Following several days of deliberation and polite inquiry, Computer announces that Amandine Boullion has been appointed. Among the conspiracy theory community this is largely assumed to be due to her family connections pulling all the right strings. Among some of the less conspiratorially minded too it appears, especially those of a Friends of Computer persuasion, who had assumed their own Morning Rainbow was a perfect shoo-in for the position.

Veta Stapel Suicide?

Rumours abound this month that after a series of disagreements with Computer, ex-ACTP member Veta Stapel has committed suicide. She is reputed to have stabbed herself and thrown herself out of an airlock. Computer denies the events and claims that the information related to Veta and her apparent death is “restricted”.

Further rumours suggest that a tape of her suicide was to be aired on Samurai Vikings, which might explain the odd footage in this month's episode. What has become of that tape is unknown, but fans of the show are already on the hunt to reveal the censored video, hoping to find the truth about her death.

Piers Is Awesome

Rumours surrounding Piers' involvement with a marshal investigation were quashed recently, after Morning Rainbow and the Friends of Computer embarked on a substantial PR campaign promoting the hard-working, exceptionally talented, and extremely attractive Piers Red.

Particularly highlighted in the documentary and on the posters are Piers' dedication and enthusiasm for his job, even going into dangerous circumstances to bring criminals to justice for the good of the ship.

The documentary contains footage of his televised termination of Friend Mary in an artistic black and white colourscheme, and set to classical music. The commentary points out how close to being murdered this hero was by the armed Mary and yet how cool Piers remained in that situation. It goes on to point out that only devotion to duty will see a man unwavering in such a standoff, and that what we see is not bloodlust or rage, it is a controlled release of the adrenaline state. Later the documentary shows Piers performing more menial tasks like filing paperwork, and ends with reports of his brave expedition into Toroid 5 to aid the Recycling department, putting the good of the ship beyond even his own life. Posters across the sectors praise Piers for embodying the values of those sectors - reducing hoarding, putting an artistic flair into his work, working hard to support his colleagues and neighbours, and so forth.

The core message of the campaign is the following: that criminals are dangerous, so perhaps the people who are tasked by Computer with bringing them to justice need to be dangerous. Age criminals are worse - being an age criminal is the worst kind of hoarding, stealing food and air from those who have not yet had a chance at life. It's an ugly and risky job being the sharp end of recycling and we should thank and praise those who give themselves to it. Piers, and others like him, are necessary and devoted to duty but also people, just like the rest of us, and they deserve to be treated with kindness and respect.

The Nick Centre for Skeptical Psychiatry

Have you been seeing monsters you don't believe are real?
Have you been troubled by mysterious voices only you can hear?
Do you suffer from reality reconciliation issues?
If so, we can help!

The newly founded Nick Centre commemorates the life's work of the man known by many as Nick the skeptic, and provides a confidential and caring approach to address inconsistencies in your world view, seeking to expose and help resolve the root cause of any conditions you may have in a discreet low pressure environment.

Appointments are free, and your medical records will be stored in the secure physical medium of paper, a time tested mechanism for preventing access by malicious hackers. Drop by today to arrange a session with one of our specially trained reality councillors!

Missing ACTP members return

Several members of an engineering expedition disappeared in strange circumstance during the operation to invert the ship.

However we can now announce the safe return of Callie Blue, Varian White, John White, Pit Blue, Carl Grey-Wrench and Darwin Blue. We are informed however that Templar Smith was sadly killed during the operation.

Recycling efforts redoubled after flip!

Under its new leadership, the Department of Recycling is apparently cracking down on those who hoard, with audits of Engineering reportedly finding systemic flaws in their record keeping requiring increased “assistance” with the recycling of “unnecessary spare parts”.

Upon hearing about this newly effective department several hoarders have reportedly handed in their collections under fear of being caught and recycled themselves.

Bureau of Cartography opening Map Exhibition

The Bureau of Cartography, after much effort, is pleased to announce a new exhibition of maps of the Asimov, as submitted by our brave and dedicated members over the past year. Special mention goes to Varian White, whose detailed and remarkably accurate maps have earned her a section all of her own. Come and marvel at the lost wonders of the Asimov, and support the Bureau and its members as we aim to reveal yet more!

We are looking for all explorers and adventurers to continue to submit maps of the ship, especially of little-travelled areas on other Toroids. Help the Bureau, and help leave a heritage for our children and our children's children!

Exhibition now open in White sector.

Notices distributed across Toroids 1 and 2

More Age Concerns Flyers

A number of paper flyers from an organization calling itself Age Concerns have been distributed, mainly in the vicinity of Blackout.

These flyers have been classified as subversive and should be recycled immediately. Please report anyone you catch distributing these flyers to your nearest Harmony personnel. Subversion is a major crime and those found guilty may face premature recycling.

For those who make the effort to acquire one, they look like this.

Samurai Vikings of the 21st Century

The latest episode makes even less sense than usual, involving flying, firebreathing fish attacking the heroes in a casino called Acheron which apparently belongs to Hades Black, and an evil warlord who controls every detail of his minions' lives, executing the sick even when cures are available amongst other heinous acts. The tone has shifted significantly, becoming much darker and dealing with themes of authoritarianism and oppression.

A scene just after the climactic battle seems to be entirely missing - the music goes sad and foreboding and then the camera cuts to what seems to be very different footage. Although the quality isn’t great, an impressive metal soundtrack kicks in as Piers Red is seen jumping on a hoverbike, then tearing off down a corridor. The camera cuts to show him shoot past at phenomenal speed, then quickly cuts again to get another few driveby shots as he shouts all sorts of classic SV21 slogans. It then cuts to a shot looking directly down the corridor, as the bike approaches. It looks like something big falls off of the bike in the distance, and as it approaches the camera, the bike suddenly explodes in a majestic fireball, and the footage cuts back.

The warlord is shown repentant, doing menial administrative work for his former slaves. This episode is perhaps not quite up to the usual standard, and the plot doesn't seem to hang together (fans have speculated that key scenes were replaced with the hoverbike chase sequence at the last minute). The casino, on the other hand, looks fun, and interest is surging in what apparently is a real casino in the heart of Blackout.

Sport report

Results League table Points
Game 13 Rainbow 3 0 Recycling Engineering 37
Health 1 3 Harmony Harmony 34
Green 2 1 Navigation Green 31
Engineering 3 0 White Red 30
Red 2 1 Blue Recycling 16
Game 14 Blue 2 2 Engineering Navigation 13
Harmony 3 1 Rainbow Rainbow 12
Red 1 2 Navigation White 11
Recycling 2 1 Green Health 8
White 1 1 Health Blue 6
Game 15 Navigation Engineering
Harmony White
Red Rainbow
Green Health
Recycling Blue
Game 16 Harmony Green
Blue Health
Recycling Navigation
White Rainbow
Engineering Red

As we head into the final stretch of the league, the top four teams are now decided: Engineering, Harmony, Green and Red will be heading into the knockout stage, with everything still to play for. In the lower part of the league, it's still very close, with all teams still vying for 5th place, and to avoid the bottom spot, which Blue currently holds.

Harmony continue their rise to the top with a 5-game unbeaten run. Controversial player Berry Green played in mid-field after her involvement in the incident which led to the death of Nick. Two easy 3-1 victories over Health and Rainbow were facilitated by excellent teamwork between Wheatley 'The Crusher' Red, Thursday White and Buzzcut Blue, with The Crusher seeming impervious to being tackled as he shrugged off waves of defenders.

Blue ended Engineering's 11-game winning streak by holding them to a 2-all draw. Previously, Engineering easily bested White 3 goals to nil. Darwin Blue announced that this would be his final match, and he left the pitch to an ovation. The absence of both Anarr Violet and Darwin Blue for the game against Blue was almost certainly a factor in the draw. However, Indium Blue continues to improve and impress, scoring both goals to save her team from embarrassment.

Red and Green are still in the running, but both took a tumble, against Navigation and Recycling respectively. Are they saving their energy for a final push in the knockout stage? With the rise of outsiders Engineering and Harmony, the Red and Green coaches must be sweating.


  • Alice Viteri has been getting guns from The Warden in exchange for people.
  • Harmony needs to be run by one of them fun loving types, not another stiff Marshall.
  • Whoever co-ordinated the performance of the Inversion must have been, like, really smart! He should get a promotion!
  • Do people join Recycling because they want to be recycled?
  • It's 0:40 am. Make your own rumours…
  • So, SV21, that bit with the black screen was totally symbolizing the death of man right?
  • All hail the lizard king.
  • Piers Red's gonna get off scot-free. Recycling will cover it all up to avoid the scandal. Corrupt Bastards.
  • You know, I always thought Crusher would be the one to kill a player, by accident, obviously.
  • Should the clocks be going backwards now we’ve flipped?
  • Revolution!!!
  • Why are they picking on Piers? I hear that at least two other people were involved.
  • Jake Rainbow vanished in a puff of smoke. He hasn't been seen since.
  • I tried my best; I only hope it's good enough.
  • We don't need a motto, we just wanna get things done!
turn_8.txt · Last modified: 2013/01/22 15:40 by gm_rosie
Except where otherwise noted, content on this wiki is licensed under the following license: CC Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported